Something To Share: The Next Person Who Asks Me When I’m Getting Married Will Get Punched In The Face. Seriously.

Another interesting read which was originally posted in Facebook by one of my friends. The title alone got my curiosity piqued, and the article that went with it surely did not disappoint. In fact, I can soo relate to it that I thought of sharing it in Facebook page and here in my blog as well. The author was very earnest in pouring out her thoughts into the article that, as I was reading along, I found myself laughing all by myself because what usually happens in real life for me (and for most single friends I know) does not deviate much from the sentiments of the author. Enjoy reading! :)

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How’s this for a New Year’s resolution? Stop asking single people when they’re getting hitched

THE NEXT person who asks me when I’m getting married will get punched in the face. Seriously.

By Pam Pastor

Philippine Daily Inquirer

First posted 22:05:00

01/02/2011

The regular person faces a lot of stress during the holiday season—there are gifts to buy, gifts to wrap, traffic to sit through, parties to go to, reunions to prepare for, food to cook, calories to count—but the unmarried person has to go through one more: dodging that stupid question.

“When are you getting married?”

It happens all the time. At parties, at family gatherings, in your own home, whenever you bump into someone you haven’t seen in a long time. And it’s not just me. Other unmarried friends go through the same thing. And it doesn’t even matter if we’re in relationships or not; they just keep asking the question, like we can just decide tomorrow that we want to throw on a white dress and sashay down that aisle.

And the question comes from all kinds of people—relatives, family friends, old friends, new friends, even virtual strangers.

We’ve exhausted all kinds of answers, from tongue-in-cheek to downright rude.

“Bukas.”

“Sakit lang ng ulo yan.”

“Bakit, ikaw ba magbabayad?”

“When I grow up.”

“When Brad leaves Angelina.”

“After your daughter does.”

“When the voices in my head stop.”

“I already am—to my laptop.”

“I’m waiting until I get pregnant.”

“The thought of waking up next to the same person makes me wanna throw up and cry.”

“And live like you? Never.”

“When I’m done with therapy.”

“When you stop asking me that question.”

But we’re done with just laughing it off.

I don’t know what Emily Post book you’re reading, but “When are you getting married?” is not an acceptable alternative to “How are you?” (Neither is “Ang taba mo ngayon!” but that deserves another article entirely.)

I don’t know why you think it’s okay.

Has this line become your official conversation starter? Is this your idea of small talk? Do you have nothing else to say to me? Do you honestly want to know? Are you that bored with your own life? Why do you want to know?

Are you buying my wedding cake? Do you want to be the first to run to Rustan’s for my gift registry? Are you dying to be my ninang?

I’m 30 and have no dreams of wearing a veil and sending out lacy invitations. I don’t fantasize about picking ring bearers and flower girls. I don’t stock up on bridal magazines. I have no secret list of bridesmaids in my head. That does not give anyone the right to pry into my life.

I don’t ask you why you and your wife still don’t have kids. I don’t ask when your husband will stop cheating on you. I don’t ask if you are going through menopause. I don’t ask when you will stop drinking. I don’t ask if your boobs are real. I don’t ask when you last went to the dentist. Stop asking when I’m getting married.

It’s annoying, it’s intrusive and it may get you physically injured.

So don’t. For the love of God and all things white and shiny, stop asking. Stop asking if I’m getting married, stop asking when I’m getting married. Because even if I were, you wouldn’t be invited.